After five years of running Nesting Place and years before that helping friends, neighbors, family and strangers with their home, and listening to my own back talk in my head for 38 years I’m pretty sure I’ve figured out the single most thing that holds us back from creating a beautiful, meaningful home on purpose.
Nope, it’s not money.
It’s not lack of creativity.
It’s not that we don’t have the time.
It’s not that someone else is holding us back.
They all come into play. But the one thing that is the biggest hurdle?
We put off making decisions, hesitate to commit to a paint color, dream about trying that DIY project but worry we’d mess it all up. We forget that the goal is not perfection when it comes to creating a home. We assume that it doesn’t feel like a risk when others chose that bold color or buy that vintage sofa and since it feels scary we stop. Or we take it to the other extreme and put off buying that sofa that we’ve needed for three years and instead spend a small fortune at Kirlkand’s or thrift stores buying too many tchotchkes because those are easy decisions that we can handle.
What if we looked at our home as not only a training ground for our children to learn how to be responsible adults but also as a training ground of sorts for ourselves? What if we decided there was a safe place in this world to make mistakes, play, take a risk and be who it is we want to be? Wouldn’t the natural place for that to start be in the comfort of home?
Because if we cannot dare to be our true selves and make mistakes in our home, how can we ever expect anyone else to let their guard down while they are there? And isn’t that the true purpose of a home? It’s there to serve us and others, it’s a place of connection, a place of rest. But we don’t always take full advantage of its true purpose and instead we become a slave to our home.
If you lower your expectations and decide that perfection isn’t the goal in creating your home, you might be amazed at what you’ll let yourself try.